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First pages

Chapter One

Into the Realm of Psychosis

“When you stare into the abyss, the abyss stares back at you.”

—Friedrich Niectche

 

The young woman woke to the sun shining into her bedroom window, it fell upon her sleepy face. She had fallen asleep crying; her pillow was still wet from her tears. Her thick purple blanket was tangled around her, as she stretched. Moaning, she rubs at her temples, a migraine pounded at the edges of her skull. Shading her puffy eyes, “Oh I don’t want to get up.”; She thinks.

Turning towards the left, looking at her sister’s bed, she notices that she had not returned home. She must have stayed the night at her best friend’s house once again; the young woman sighs heavily in disapproval. The young woman lies against her pillows while the memories of the night before flooding her mind. She winces as she recalls the argument, the painful breakup between her and her boyfriend.

The day before she had caught him cheating with one of her friends, Anna. Anna was supposed to be a good friend of hers, she thought. The young woman had walked in on them having sex in his apartment. In that single moment, her heart was shattered, the devastation swallowed her whole. She quietly rushed out of the apartment. They had not seen nor hear her.

The young woman had confronted him about what she had seen the following day, last night. He had laughed at her, “I don’t care what you think or how you feel about it. I wanted to fuck her, so I did.” Horrified she cried, “How can you say that? I love you I would do anything for you, Weiland!” Shaking she stood in front of him waiting for him to speak, to answer her yet he wouldn’t.

The young man whom she had given her heart to, laughed at her wildly, “You crazy Bitch! I can’t stand to be with you anymore Rosa! I don’t want to be with you! Matter of fact Anna isn’t the only friend of yours I have fucked.” Speechless she stood with tears falling from her blue eyes, “What, what do you mean?” Laughing Weiland replies, “Think about it...”, he turns to leave her apartment swiftly.

Rosa rushes over to him taking his hand, “Please don’t go, please stay talk to me, tell me what I can do to make it better.” Weiland roughly pulls away from her, hitting her face, while pushing her away, she lands on the floor. Crying she covers her face, shaking her head as he strode out the front door of her apartment

A few moments later she stood up, staggering into the bathroom because her backside hurt. Scanning the bathroom mirror, she could see his angry response across her right cheek, it burned a crimson red. Looking at her reflection, the heartbreak, and pain reflected in her blue eyes. Rosa thoughts raced through her mind, why had he hit her? He had never done it before, why was he so cruel? It was like he was a totally different man.

Hours later Rosa went to bed before her father and sister came home, she didn’t want to deal with them. A while later her father nosily came into the apartment after work. Instinctively she snuggled deeper beneath her cozy warm blanket.

He leaned in the doorway to check on her; to also let her know he was home. She did not respond; pretending to be asleep. Her father left her doorway; walking into the living room. She could hear his favorite TV show WWE on the TV; falling asleep to the soundtrack of SmackDown and her dad cheering on his favorite wrestlers.

As the morning light shined down on her, tears sprang to her eyes, but she wouldn’t allow them to fall. Pushing the blanket off, she sits up “I won’t allow him to get to me.”; she thinks. She dresses quickly into a pair of black jeans, a black t-shirt, and black sneakers. Going into the bathroom she glances into the mirror, thankfully the crimson red mark across her cheek had disappeared. While brushing her hair, she considers her plans for the day, a beautiful Saturday. She could go over to his apartment and confront him again. Or she could just go over to her aunt’s house to get away for a while.

As her head ached, she thought about just staying in her bed and allowing it to consume her, she also knew if she did it would be awful. She had been dealing with migraine headaches for seven years, and she needed to get up and moving; Rosa made her decision.

After Rosa eats a quick breakfast, she takes a few Tylenol to get rid of her headache. Before leaving her apartment, she jots down a note for her father, “Father, I have gone to Aunt Sally’s for a little while I will be back soon. Rosa.” Leaving the paper on the coffee table, she walks out of the apartment to their storage shed. Inside the small shed was her black 10-speed bike, her father had bought it for Rosa’s sixteenth birthday.

Hopping onto her bike, Rosa speeds across the city streets towards her Aunt Sally’s house. It was a beautiful and long ride. Living on both sides of the Northside of Elmira; Rosa could go diverse ways to get there, and she rode by different businesses, homes, and the college. She loved it all, it flashed by as she speeds along them.

When she arrived, Rosa was happy to notice her cousin Maci, nor her boyfriend Kent were there; relieved to be alone with Aunt Sally for a little while. Rosa hoped she could have a conversation about her breakup, she wasn’t sure if she should make amends or not, forgive him or not. Rosa’s mind and heart were conflicted, she needed guidance desperately.

Rosa sits beside Aunt Sally on the large brown couch, her mischievous cat purrs as Rosa strokes it. They are watching TV, sitting in awkward silence; then Aunt Sally asks, “Rosa what is the matter?” Deep in her own tortuous thoughts she doesn’t answer. A moment later Aunt Sally pulls Rosa out of her silent thoughts, “Rosa I have been calling your name for the last minute or so... where have you drifted off to?” Rosa sits up straighter, the mischievous cat meows its protest; “Oh I just thinking.” “What is going on, what is the matter?” Rosa shrugs, “Weiland and I have broken up.” Surprised Aunt Sally looks up sharply at her, “When, why and how?” Rosa begins to tell her about the night before, “I confronted Weiland about cheating on me with my friend Anna, and he didn’t deny it.” Aunt Sally nods, Rosa continues, “He laughed at me telling me I was a crazy bitch! He also said he didn’t love me or want to be with me anymore.”

Interrupting their conversation with a swift breeze of cool spring air and laughter; her cousin Maci, and her boyfriend Kent walk into the house. Weiland steps in behind them, closing the door. When the group enters stopping in mid stride, noticing Rosa sitting beside Aunt Sally. Their mouths drop open, when they see her not expecting her to be there; they had been discussing her a few minutes earlier. Rosa begins to shake inwardly, cold sweat breaks out on her forehead, she had not expected to see Weiland so soon.

Rosa’s mouth drops, her lip trembles as tears shine in her eyes, standing up she swiftly walks upstairs to the bathroom. She did not want him to see her so shaken by his presence. Locking the bathroom door behind her, blocking out their voices. Rosa sat on the toilet roughly, breathing rapidly as the tears flowed freely. Silent cries broke loose, as her throat closed around her voice; she shook violently as her emotions took over her.

Downstairs Aunt Sally, Maci, Kent and Weiland sat around the Livingroom discussing the situation. While Rosa sat in the bathroom drowning in her tears she could hear their conversation travel through the heating vents. The anger swelled within her, yet it was still beneath the pain she felt.

Rosa took a deep breath; her self-esteem had sunk down into an abyss. She didn’t know how to pull herself out of it, and she didn’t know if she wanted to. However, she wasn’t going to allow anyone see it.

 A darkness loomed around, sniffing at her sweet smell; what a tender heart and soul to reap. It’s sympathetic evil little lies whispered into her ears, “You are no good, you are not wanted.”

Rosa eventually shuts the darkness off and turning away from it. Five minutes later, after washing her face and gaining her composure she listlessly strides downstairs. Stopping on the landing of the stairs Rosa watches the scene for several moments, all of them laughing. As the darkness lingered, she could feel its awkward presence, her heart ached. She watches as her family accepted the cheater into their home, into their family. Betrayal slithered around her, and it destroyed her sanctuary.

Stepping off the landing and into the Livingroom; she announces, “I have to go Aunt Sally, um I need to be home before dad gets there.” Aunt Sally nods, “Yes sweetheart, I love you.” Rosa nods, “I love you too, bye”; progressing towards the front door.

When she reached for the golden doorknob, Weiland’s voice traveled across the room to her ears. In a cruel mocking voice, “I am sorry that you must leave so soon, Rosa you will be missed.” The cruelty pierced her heart, tears burned behind her eyelids, she opened the front door slipping through it.

Closing it on cruel laughter between him, Maci, and Kent. Not allowing herself to cry she roughly unlocks her bike from the front porch; “I hate him!”, she thinks while riding off swiftly. Riding across town, the cool spring air flowed through Rosa’s long dark hair. Car horns honk angrily when she speeds across the streets, not caring if she passed on a red or green light. A lingering suicidal thought perhaps. Passing the local Burger King the smell of cooking burgers and French fries assault Rosa’s nose making her stomach grumble in hunger. Ignoring her grumbles Rosa peddles faster, wanting to get away from Aunt Sally’s house. Turning sharply around the corner, the local college campus was on both sides of her now.

Elmira College was beautiful, its school colors are purple and gold, Rosa had learned it was one of the oldest colleges that accepted women. With a beautiful fountain, purple and yellow tulips blooming throughout the grounds, and all the old buildings, Rosa is astounded by the beauty of the campus. She had seen many of the students sunbathing, playing baseball or just studying out in the middle of the field, on many occasions.

Rosa’s father also worked for the college as a caretaker of the grounds for years. She turned swiftly around the next corner, hoping he wouldn’t see her. Peddling rapidly; allowing the smells and sounds of Elmira to fill her, to block her own deadly thoughts. The houses and businesses passed by her in a haze.

She finally passed by her High School, Elmira Free Academy; only one more block and she would be inside her apartment complex. Ridged harsh breaths broke loose from her lips as the large blue building of EFA flew by her as she raced by. Only a month and a few more weeks, she would be free of High School and perhaps the grip of this town and her father.

Seconds later Rosa turns into her apartment complex, looking carefully for cars and other bicycles, the spring wind whipped her long hair around her face. Inside the complex small playgrounds were built in between the apartment building sections, for little children to play safely. A small fenced creek ran along the backside of the complex and Elmira Free Academy. The teenagers figured out how to make a hole in the fence, and use the creek to smoke, do drugs or have sex during school. There was a large empty field in between Rosa’s apartment building and the edge of her school. Which was also fenced, but many students had put a hole through it to make a short cut to get to school. Rosa loved the field because it was picturesque with the wild flowers blooming.

Rosa liked her neighborhood, it was peaceful, and her neighbors were like family to her and her sister, Leila. Reaching her own apartment, she skids to a sudden stop at her front steps; jumping off her bike. Loud music blasted from the open windows and front door, Leila was home. Rosa could hear her sister’s music blaring, she dreaded going inside. Rosa slowly pushes her bike towards the storage shed, locking it up before going inside. Rosa dreaded going into her apartment, having to deal with Leila’s drama.

It seemed her sister, Leila always got under her skin no matter what the situation was about. As much as Rosa tried not to allow Leila the gratification of getting to her, it seemed that she could do it. Reluctantly Rosa steps through the front door of her apartment, her face was flush from the ride over and the cool air. Leila was in their bedroom, singing loudly and mostly likely making a mess of it. Rosa sighs heavily as she looked around the small apartment, outraged by the hurricane that went through it, Hurricane Leila. Irritating Rosa with each item she picks up, mumbling under her breath; “If Father comes home, I’ll be in trouble for this shit! Not Leila.” Rosa was getting tired of being punished for her sister’s antics and selfishness; in anger and despair Rosa continues to pick up.

Leila must have come home shortly after Rosa left, The TV was on, blaring MTV’s Teen Mom a show that Rosa despised. After picking up, she calls out, “Leila, where are you?”, looking in her bedroom she finds her sister lying on her bed, reading a book. Rosa raises her voice, “Leila didn’t you hear me come in? Can’t you clean up after yourself?” Leila rolls her eyes, “And why should I care? You cleaned the house, right?” Astounded and upset Rosa replies, “Yes, I have picked up, but you can help also!”

 Leila places her book down before getting up, “No I am not cleaning! I will be leaving soon; I’m going to Tai’s.” Rosa shook her head, “Of course to go out whoring again.”; turning her back on Leila. Leila rises off the bed then runs towards Rosa, she wraps her fingers into Rosa’s long loose hair. Pulling her into their bedroom, slamming her head against the wall, knocking all reason from Rosa. Blinding pain filled her head, as light and darkness danced in front her eyes; her hands rose involuntarily to her head. Leila ripped at Rosa’s hair pulling back her head, punching her face repeatedly.

Rosa tries to defend herself from the assault, yet she was backed into a corner, she weakly punched and kicked at Leila. Screaming at Leila, “What the fuck are you doing? I hate you!”, struggling to stand to her feet. Leila punches her in the belly quickly, taking Rosa’s breath away. Slumping to the ground gasping for air, she crawls away from the beast of Leila stomping towards her.

Rosa tries to gain her balance, her face swelled and her head began to pound, yet she wouldn’t allow Leila the gratification to see the pain on her face. Taking a deep breath Rosa stood up, making Leila lose her balance. Rosa stumbles to her feet, getting into a defense stance; with blood running down her face, it ran into her left eye, she raised her fists. Leila attacks again, Rosa moved swiftly to the left then swung her right fist with all the force she could.

Hitting Leila squarely in the eye and knocking her back, giving Rosa a moment to get out of the bedroom and into the Livingroom. The anger heated her flesh, turning her sight red as her mind filled with rage. Rosa was tired of Leila’s abuse, of being punished by father because Leila refused to follow his rules. “Why must I be the whipping post?”, she angrily thinks.

Rosa stood straighter waiting for Leila to walk into the Livingroom, waiting for her to attack again. Storming through the doorway of the room Leila rages at her, “You little Bitch! I hate you, you are a dumb cunt.” Rosa didn’t listen to the hurtful words, “You are the bitch Leila and I am tired of you getting away with everything! I am tired of being the one that is always being hurt!” They fought through the Livingroom, screaming and throwing things at each other. The anger swells deeper inside of Rosa, her flesh flushes ruby red and her blue eyes blaze with rage.

The darkness that dwells within their home, growing thicker and bigger. Feeding off their anger, pain and fighting. It laughed and frolicked around them unknown to either. A darkness laid beside Leila stroking her hair, whispering evil thoughts and ideas into her ear.

This darkness was welcomed into their home by Leila when she began to cohort with evil entities and black magic. To frighten Rosa, to use it to gain the items she wanted, not thinking about the price she would someday have to pay.

Moving across the room, they swing their fists, hitting walls and flesh, cutting open eyebrows and lips as blood flew across the room. Leila eventually got the better of Rosa, tackling her through the living room wall making a huge hole through it. Rosa breathless and semi conscience slid to the floor, lingering in semi darkness for a few moments.

The darkness dances wildly as she lies on the floor, light and darkness teases her. Rosa sees a Shadowy man dancing, gloating and beckoning to her.

Leila’s laughter filled her ears, “No wonder Weiland doesn’t want to be with you, you’re a little pathetic bitch!” Leila’s words bring Rosa back to the fight, confused Rosa asks, “What are you talking about? How did you know we broke up?” Rosa slowly pulls herself up off the floor, and gingerly treads towards Leila, “What?!?” Leila giggles viciously, “I have known, I’ve been fucking him too!” Not believing it Rosa refuses to listen to Leila, shaking her head, “No I don’t, you are just lying to hurt me” Leila grins, “I just fucked him last night at Tai’s, after your break up.”

Tears sprang to Rosa’s eyes, rage filled her mind and heart, “NO!” she screamed. The shadowy man leapt with glee, as he watched the carnage begin. Leila sniggered, “Yes, please cry let me see those tears.” Suddenly all emotions evaporated from her, all but complete rage, when she lifted her head, Leila did not see tears of sadness but of rage; no longer seeing Rosa inside her blue eyes but a darkness hiding behind them.

The rage took over Rosa, she attacked Leila not caring what the consequences would be. Punching and scratching at her as they fell to the hard-green couch, Rosa lands on Leila. She wraps her hands around Leila’s throat choking her, tighten her grip as she screamed with fury, “You bitch, I hate you I hate you I hate you, DIE, DIE, DIE!”

Leila kicked, punched, and scratched at Rosa, her eyes filled with fear as she fought for her life. Terrified she fought her sister off; fighting off whatever had taken over her sister. She screamed Rosa’s name repeatedly until she could no longer breathe, no longer create the words. Unexpectedly Rosa releases Leila, falling to the floor shaking in shock, and grief, “GET OUT NOW, just get out.”

Leila kicked and pushed herself up and off the couch and away from Rosa, running to the front door. Slamming it behind her, Rosa stood up and locked it. Sitting on the couch, she looked at her hands shaking, almost in a trance. “What was that?”, she thought. “What came over me I would never do such a thing”, scared she sat in complete silence.

II

Bitterness is like cancer. It eats upon the host. But anger is like fire. It burns it all clean.

---Maya Angelou

 

Aunt Loren was Leila’s sanctuary, she reminded Leila of her mother because they looked similar. Aunt Loren was sitting in the living room with her sons when Leila ran into her apartment without knocking. Scaring her and the boys, Leila told her about what had happened in frantic out of breath stutters. After calming her down, Aunt Loren and one of her boys Joven, and Leila stomp over to the girls’ apartment.

Aunt Loren and Joven knocked on the front door lightly, yet Rosa doesn’t answer it. Rosa remained sitting on the couch in a daze as the darkness continues to whisper inside her ears. After climbing through the girls’ open bedroom window Joven steps into the Livingroom, waking Rosa from her quiet trance

Frightened Rosa whispers,” What are you doing in here?” Joven replies, “Leila said you beat the shit out of her and tried to kill her.” Moving to the front door, he unlocks it allowing Aunt Loren and Leila inside. Shaking with rage Rosa stands up, ignoring Leila afraid of what she may say, she slowly walks to her room. Rosa closes her bedroom door before sitting on her large comfortable bed, waiting for her father to come home.

 Rosa sat alone in her room, composing herself not allowing the rage to continue to course through her veins. She knew that were would be a horrific wrath, when Father returned home, she had to prepare herself for the brutality of it.

Leila and Aunt Loren worked together to clean the small apartment, so it shined. The only mess that would be left would be the big whole that Leila had made by throwing Rosa into the living room wall. There would also be a blood stain on the bedroom door where Leila slammed her head into it. Rosa didn’t care.

The shadowy man, the form that the darkness took sat on Leila’s bed and watched Rosa. It decided that Rosa would be his queen, it would be taking her heart and soul, it began to plan its attack.

Lying in her bed Rosa waited for her father to come home, knowing her punishment would be inside his wrath; she didn’t care. Rosa could feel the darkness sweeping over her again. Lying against her headboard she allows it to snuggle up against her, comforting her.

Nearby was her small wooden bookshelf, filled with many books, notebooks, pictures of her friends and on top of it was a picture of her and Weiland in a wood frame. The books were of her favorite authors Stephen King, Anne Rice and Anne Rule. Looking at the picture of Weiland and herself, she begins to weep. It had been taken at her Prom, oh how happy they seemed to be that night. The night she had given herself to him.

It was a beautiful and wonderful night; her prom was held at the Elmira Country Club. Weiland had been handsome in his black tuxedo with his matching purple tie, she had worn a purple strapless dress. Weiland had taken her out to a romantic dinner before going to the club, then afterwards Rosa gave Weiland her virginity.

They went to his apartment, he had laid rose petals across his bed, candles were lit around his room, and he was so sweet. After waiting for over a year, they had made love. He had been patient with her. He had made promises to her; yet he had broken all of them; crushing her. How could he have gone from such a sweet loving gentle man to the cruel hurtful man the night before? To the cheater, she knew he was? How did he change so much? Or had he always been so cruel and just hid it so well? Was she just blinded by love, blinded by the man she wanted him to be? Rosa thought Weiland had loved her, yet he broke her heart, threw her away like she was a piece of garbage.

Hearing her father come into the apartment, she pulls herself from her sad memories. Waiting for him to come in, would it be his fists or his belt? Which one would it be to pounce on her, or would he just simply give her the disapproving look? Father would never believe the truth, he would only believe his little princess, Leila. “Oh, how I hate her!” The darkness swept across Rosa’s mind, sinking deeper into despair although she didn’t have a name for it. The heaviness of the darkness wrapped itself tightly around her.

Several minutes later father knocks on the girls’ bedroom door, opening it before Rosa could respond. “We need to talk young lady, about what had happened.” Rosa looks away “What do you want me to say?” Annoyed father answers, “Don’t give me that tone, Rosa. Why do you think you and your sister can behave this way?” Anger and hurt fills her thoughts, she remains silent inside the dimness of her room. Waiting for him to attack.

The darkness watches the drama play out with glee…….

Rosa sharply looks at her father, “What!? How am I supposed to control Leila? Why should I take her verbal and physical assault; oh, that’s right your princess does no wrong.” Steaming John retorts, “Well I think you both need time away from each other, Leila went to Tai’s house for the night. You are to stay home for a while.”

The darkness listens carefully to their conversation as it sat in the shadowy corner; stalking its prey.

Angry Rosa retorts, “What, that isn’t fair!?” Father slaps her across the face fast and crudely, “I said for you to be home and think about what you did! And that is what you will do” Rosa’s cheek stung with flaring pain. Her dad didn’t see nor care that her face was already bruising from the fight.

Silently she sat in her bed watching him march out of her room, closing the door behind him. Silently, raging she wishes him dead, she wishes Leila dead then immediately takes it back. Rosa silently shrieks her rage; she couldn’t set it free; because her Father would return, and the beating would begin.

Pacing around her room, the tortuous evil night caresses and soothes her broken soul. Rosa refused to leave her bedroom, when father had called for her. She would not eat with him nor speak to him either. She laid in her bed with her cozy purple blanket wrapped around her, Stephen King’s Book in her hands. Rosa waited for him to return, to begin his verbal, emotional abuse then the physical abuse would happen. Falling asleep while reading, her book falls to the floor.

The shadowy man slips inside her bed beside her, wrapping its deadly dark arms around her. Rosa had frightful, dark deadly nightmares all night. Restless sleep feeding the shadowy entity.

The next day was a blur of raw emotions for Rosa, the sunlight burned through her bedroom window waking her from her nightmares. Eventually she dressed into black sweatpants and a hoodie along with black sneakers. She pulls her long hair into a loose ponytail before leaving her bedroom; she glances into her mirror seeing the bumps and bruises on her face, the black eye that had developed over night. “And I get punished for all of this.”; she angrily gasps.

Walking into the living room, Rosa sees that her father had already left for the day. She sees a starch white paper with his scratchy handwriting on it, the paper laid on top of the coffee table; a list of chores to do, a reminder not to leave the house. Working like a robot she cleaned the house once again, hanging the laundry out on the rope clothesline behind the apartment. Stopping long enough to breathe in the cool spring air, birds chirped and flew around in the trees above her, yet she didn’t acknowledge them.

After finishing all her chores Rosa decides to write for a little while, when she enters her room all her energy is drained, she becomes sad and tired. Numbly she pulls out her hidden journal from under her bed, writing in it furiously for several moments. Leaving all her screams and emotions on the paper, her cruel thoughts and wishes were laid out on the pages as she held tightly to the pen writing until her fingers cramped and could no longer write. Finally, Rosa releases the pen from her hand, letting it fall to her mattress before closing the journal. She hides her journal under it swiftly, hiding away all her dark thoughts; not allowing them to have life outside the binds.

Rosa took her book off the shelf, sat back against her headboard, becoming comfortable; she began to read. As the story swallowed her into the plot, she lost her sense of time, enjoy each little twist and turn that the main character had to face. Time slipped by as she spent time within the binds of the book, dusk fell upon the apartment.

The darkness that lived within her room, sat in the corner and watched her patiently learning, plotting to get its desire. Its shadowy mouth smirked inside the blackness of its face; “soon very soon”, it thought.

Without warning father and Leila saunter into the apartment, Rosa waits for the verbal assault from her sister, and the fight to begin again. Nonetheless it did not happen, Dad was behind Leila, was it time for dinner already? She had not realized that the day flew by, that it was so late. During dinner they have a mumbled conversation; Rosa kept her eyes lowered, no one noticed her bruises. The rage brewed, a fiery heat bloomed inside her bright blue irises; the anger grew. Afterwards she cleaned the kitchen without Leila helping. She went to bed silently, fearful her father would hear the rage bubbling in her voice.

Watching Rosa walk into the room, Leila wishes for her to die, to be rid of her sister forever. Rosa senses her sister watching her, she doesn’t look at Leila, keeping her back turned away. She could spit fire out at her, but she swallowed the painful heat down. Rosa had to be the mature one, she had to be the gate keeper of peace.

As Leia fell asleep, the entity slipped in beside her. Caressing Leila’s body eagerly, desirous, and ecstatic that its master was home. Its master that ruled over him so brilliantly, if a demon could love it would love her.

Chapter Two

The Road to Destruction

The quickest path to self-destruction is to push away the people you love.”—Casia Leo, pieces of You

 

 

The next morning Rosa’s alarm woke her, waking her from her restless dreams with music. Groggy she pulls herself out of bed, “Leila it’s time to get up for school.”, she calls while gathering her clothes for the day. After locking the bathroom door, she turns the hot water on, glancing into the mirror. The medium-size purplish bruise across her left eye had begun to fade, her cut lip and eyebrow also began to heal although her lip still stung. She sighs heavily, “Oh fucking well I don’t give a damn any more what I look like.”, she thinks. Her father used her as a punching bag, that is what she is a punching bag no more or no less.

Turning away from the mirror she steps into the shower, the hot steamy water flowed over her body, and hair soothing her aching body. Washing her hair and body harshly she tries to scrub away all the aches and pains she had. Eventually rinsing her hair, the soapy water flowed over and around her body. Stepping beneath the stream of gushing hot water, all sound and sight was silenced, the hum and rhythm of the water pulsed with her heartbeat. The hot soapy water swirled around the basin, into the drain taking away all the negative energy away with it.

Unexpectedly a pounding broke her peaceful calm. Bang, Bang! A loud banging on the bathroom door brought her out from beneath the flow of water. While turning the shower off she pulls the curtain aside, stepping out of it. She loudly answers the bangs, “I am coming out give me a minute.” Leila replies rudely, “Hurry up I need to use the bathroom also, you don’t need all morning, it’s not like you need to get any uglier.”

Shaking her head Rosa ignores the comment and swiftly dresses before tossing her dirty clothes and towels into the hamper. Leila stood in the hall, leaning against the washing machine, tapping her foot “About time I do need to get ready also.” Rosa strides pass Leila; “You better use some extra make-up Leila to cover up that black eye.”

Rosa decided to have a couple slices of wheat toast with butter and cup of hot tea for breakfast, she ate quickly. Rosa left the apartment early, to avoid Leila’ mocking. The morning air was cool nevertheless delightfully cool, taking a deep breath refreshes her senses. Getting closer to Elmira Free Academy and her group of friends, Rosa becomes more cheerful. “Only a few more weeks of High School and perhaps I may be able to get away from father and Leila, perhaps away from running into Weiland also.”, she reflects.

Her friends stood on the “Smoking corner” waiting for her to arrive; the smoking corner was only one of many places near and on school grounds where they would be able to smoke without being caught. With a grin on her face Rosa waves at her friends, these people were the only ones she could truly trust. Her best friend Rowan, Rowan’s boyfriend Arthur and Lev had been her friends since the eighth grade.

Arthur was the captain of the varsity football team of the school, tall, attractive with blonde hair and green eyes, although all the girls were attracted to him, he only had eyes for Rowan. Rowan was also attractive, with long red hair, green sparkling eyes, she didn’t participate in any sports or clubs because she worked after school. Lev was the editor in chief of the school newspaper, he was average in height, has medium length brown hair and eyes; he was also the president of the LGBT club.

Rosa strolls up to the group, “Hi, what’s up?” they begin to discuss their weekend. Lev talks about his newspaper editorial, and Arthur announces how a college scout had called him about a scholarship. Rosa hugged him tightly, “Congratulations !! that is awesome.” Rowan smiles softly, “Yep, I am proud of my man, he is remarkable.”


AUTHOR Q&A

About me

Colleen Tice lives with her husband of 21yrs, Charles Tice, 3 children and boxer pup Gunner in upstate NY. Colleen was raised in Brooklyn and Elmira NY, living with her mother, father and her younger sister Kimberly in Staten Island NY until her mother passed away from AML Leukemia. Thank you my beloved husband Chuck, for always be my rock when I fall, for always being my lighthouse when I am lost inside my own personal storms; for always loving me through everything. Always yours.

Q. Is there a message in your book that you want readers to grasp?
A.
No matter what cocoon you feel trapped inside right now, remember you are a strong and beautiful butterfly waiting to fly......
Q. Which writers inspire you?
A.
Ms. Anne Rice, Mr. Stephen King and Ms. Anne Rule.. I also read so many others but these r my favorites.
Q. What books are you reading now?
A.
The Shack by William P Young at the moment waiting for Christmas to get my new Anne Rice book and Stephen King book

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